'Marriage Isn’t For You': Seth Adam Smith

This is Seth Adam Smith and his wife, Kim. They’ve been married a year and a half, and Seth just realised: marriage is not for him.

He also realised so much more than that. This is a recent entry from his blog. Have a read of this soon-to-be-viral post.

Marriage Isn’t For You

Having been married only a year and a half, I’ve recently come to the conclusion that marriage isn’t for me.

Now before you start making assumptions, keep reading.

Seth Adam Smith and his wife Kim

I met my wife in high school when we were 15 years old. We were friends for ten years until…until we decided no longer wanted to be just friends.  I strongly recommend that best friends fall in love. Good times will be had by all.

Nevertheless, falling in love with my best friend did not prevent me from having certain fears and anxieties about getting married. The nearer Kim and I approached the decision to marry, the more I was filled with a paralyzing fear. Was I ready? Was I making the right choice? Was Kim the right person to marry? Would she make me happy?

Then, one fateful night, I shared these thoughts and concerns with my dad.

Perhaps each of us have moments in our lives when it feels like time slows down or the air becomes still and everything around us seems to draw in, marking that moment as one we will never forget.

My dad giving his response to my concerns was such a moment for me. With a knowing smile he said, “Seth, you’re being totally selfish. So I’m going to make this really simple: marriage isn’t for you. You don’t marry to make yourself happy, you marry to make someone else happy. More than that, your marriage isn’t for yourself, you’re marrying for a family. Not just for the in-laws and all of that nonsense, but for your future children. Who do you want to help you raise them? Who do you want to influence them? Marriage isn’t for you. It’s not about you. Marriage is about the person you married.”

It was in that very moment that I knew that Kim was the right person person to marry. I realized that I wanted to make her happy; to see her smile every day, to make her laugh every day. I wanted to be a part of her family, and my family wanted her to be a part of ours. And thinking back on all the times I had seen her play with my nieces, I knew that she was the one with whom I wanted to build our own family.

My father’s advice was both shocking and revelatory. It went against the grain of today’s “Walmart philosophy”, which is if it doesn’t make you happy, you can take it back and get a new one.

No, a true marriage (and true love) is never about you. It’s about the person you love—their wants, their needs, their hopes, and their dreams. Selfishness demands, “What’s in it for me?”, while Love asks, “What can I give?”

Some time ago, my wife showed me what it means to love selflessly. For many months, my heart had been hardening with a mixture of fear and resentment. Then, after the pressure had built up to where neither of us could stand it, emotions erupted. I was callous. I was selfish.

But instead of matching my selfishness, Kim did something beyond wonderful—she showed an outpouring of love. Laying aside all of the pain and aguish I had caused her, she lovingly took me in her arms and soothed my soul.

I realized that I had forgotten my dad’s advice. While Kim’s side of the marriage had been to love me, my side of the marriage had become all about me. This awful realization brought me to tears, and I promised my wife that I would try to be better.

To all who are reading this article—married, almost married, single, or even the sworn bachelor or bachelorette—I want you to know that marriage isn’t for you. No true relationship of love is for you. Love is about the person you love.

And, paradoxically, the more you truly love that person, the more love you receive. And not just from your significant other, but from their friends and their family and thousands of others you never would have met had your love remained self-centered.

Truly, love and marriage isn’t for you. It’s for others.

What did you think of Seth's piece? Does it mirror your approach to marriage and/or relationships?

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Tina Arena: Interview - Jetstar Magazine

I had the pleasure of interviewing Tina Arena for the first time in 2001.

I remember the date vividly - September 10, 2001 - because it was the day before that fateful day which changed the world, September 11.

Tina was gorgeous and charming and warm and smart. We met at Sydney's Ivy, on the second floor of the venue's 'Ivy Lounge'.

She was as open and giving in the interview as I'd hoped. And the love affair I - and millions of fellow Australians - well and truly continued.

That interview appeared in 'Cream magazine.'

I then had the opportunity to speak to Tina again last year, in line with her series of highly anticipated Australian concerts (the Sydney concert at the Sydney Opera House was something else).

That interview appeared in Jetstar magazine, as a cover story.

Here is the first part, cut and pasted from the Jetstar magazine site (click link below for more).

Tina, you continue to be an (Italo) Australian treasure.

Every single 'Young Talent Time' clip of Tina Arena on tonight's 'Sunday Night' reminded me of innocent times in the 1970s when I'd sit on the carpet in the 'old house' and watch Tina thisclose to the TV, and hear my parents talk about being SO proud to see an Italian (Sicilian, even!) on an Aussie TV show.

C'mon Italo-Aussies, you know it! Our folks would even hint that maybe, just maybe, we too could be on that show!

Tina's new album 'Reset' is out this week, as is her autobiography 'Now I Can Dance.' For more, click here.

BACK WHERE IT BEGAN

From representing Australia on the world stage, to embracing her new TV role which honours her performance roots, Tina Arena is truly a national icon

WORDS JOSIE GAGLIANO

You could kick off a story about Tina Arena citing all the obvious descriptions and accolades — cut her teeth in showbiz at age seven; a huge star in France; one of the most enduring talents of our time. But you could also start a piece on Arena highlighting she's one of the nicest, most giving, honest, funny women Australian showbiz has ever seen.

Born Filippina Lidia Arena to Sicilian immigrant parents Giuseppe and Franca in East Keilor, Victoria, 44 years ago, Tina clearly had a natural knack for entertaining from an early age. She made her TV debut on an Australian talent show called Young Talent Time (YTT) at the tender age of "seven and a half".

Arena recalls: "Our time wasn't as complicated as it is today; we were much more happy-go-lucky, nonchalant kids. It wasn't a generation of high technology and internet, so we didn't have all those 'stumbling blocks'. It was a very innocent time."

Read more here.

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"300 sandwiches away from an engagement ring." - Stephanie Smith's experiment.

Can you hear that?

It's the sound of people all over the world, utterly aghast.

Not really.

This woman kicked off an experiment, which can be described as fun, delicious... and a tad 'Stepford Wife' perhaps?

The woman - Stephanie Smith - is 300 sandwiches away from an engagement ring.

Here is Stephanie and her boyfriend Eric:

Here is an excerpt from the story:

Since last June, a young woman has attracted attention from culinary world icons such as Emeril Lagasse, Michael White and Ken Friedman with 300sandwiches.com, a beautifully photographed blog that documents her quest to woo her boyfriend with bread-and-meat creations. We now reveal that the woman behind the blog is our very own Page Six senior reporter, STEPHANIE SMITH. Here, she tells her story — and shares some recipes.

My boyfriend, Eric, is the gourmet cook in our relationship, but he’d always want me to make him a sandwich.

Each morning, he would ask, “Honey, how long you have been awake?”

“About 15 minutes,” I’d reply.

“You’ve been up for 15 minutes and you haven’t made me a sandwich?”

To him, sandwiches are like kisses or hugs. Or sex. “Sandwiches are love,” he says. “Especially when you make them. You can’t get a sandwich with love from the deli.”

One lazy summer afternoon just over a year ago, I finally gave in. I assembled turkey and Swiss on toasted wheat bread. I spread Dijon mustard generously on both bread slices, and I made sure the lettuce was perfectly in line with the neatly stacked turkey slices.

Eric devoured the sandwich as if it were a five-star meal, diving in with large, eager bites. “Babes, this is delicious!” he exclaimed.

As he finished that last bite, he made an unexpected declaration of how much he loved me and that sandwich: “Honey, you’re 300 sandwiches away from an engagement ring!”

Yup. I know. Scandalous!

Look. Nobody should bribe anyone with anything for an engagement ring, ever.

This sounds like something that started exactly as described above, in jest. Her editor said "Write a story!" and it snowballed from there. He's probs going to propose anyway, and they've talked about it, and she knows it. And this is a fun way to get there, and they're having a chuckle along the way. Meanwhile, it's all "Oh my GAWD, dump him girl!" and, "God, what a pig", etc, etc.

Me: I LOVE cooking for my husband. Love seeing him hoe into a fresh batch of pasta which I know is so good when he eats it straight from the pot, and mops up the tomato sauce with bread. This gives me great pleasure. We are a bit traditional: I do all the cooking, but yeah, he helps a LOT with the cleaning. Not "helps", actually. Does it because he loves it. Yeah, I know. Weird.

Does it annoy me sometimes when I have to cook and don't feel like it? Hell yes.

What do you think of the above? Comment below!

Read the rest of the 'New York Post' article here.

To see the recipes of the sambos she's cooked and assembled so far (damn delicious, and some, rather intricate and labour-intensive!), click here.

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Tiny Baby

-Tytan Amos Pease-

8 lbs 1.6 oz 21" long

9-22-13

 

{Two years ago we lost a dear family member way too early. On the 2 year mark from when she left us here on Earth, this sweet little Miracle Baby was sent to the most loving, caring family you could ever imagine. There's no doubt in my mind this tiny chunker was hand-picked & comforted his whole way here..}

 

 

I'm so happy and thankful to have this new little Miracle Baby in our family!
Welcome to this beautiful world Tytan, I already love you more than you'll ever know.

 

XOXO

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Groom POV Hidden Camera: Viral Video

This is kinda cool.

This soon to be viral video shows a newly married man capturing his wedding day from his perpective.

In the YouTube description, the film maker says:

"I had to 1-up my 3D wedding proposal, and what better way to do it than by recording the event with the first ever (?) groom POV hidden camera.

I wore several hidden HD Cameras at our wedding to capture every moment from my point of view. This video is of the hidden camera I wore at eye level during the ceremony and reception. Here are the highlights, including the best moments from the ceremony, first entrance, first dance, cake cutting, and garter removal!

As far as tech, I used a 1080p 808 #26 keychain camera with a 15" lens extension cable affixed to my glasses throughout the entire wedding.

Full geeky goodness on the project here: michaelkammes.com"

Now... watch the clever video:



What do you think? Would you use this technology to capture your wedding day?

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Anthony Del Col: Dedication to his parents

This post is dedicated to Anthony Del Col.

We had a message exchange only a few months ago, on the day of his parents' 50th wedding anniversary.

His beloved father had passed away in September 2012, and his parents' wedding anniversary was in April 2013. 

He posted some incredibly beautiful photos of his parents' wedding day, with a caption.

I asked Anthony if I could use them. He said yes:

Anth, that is a BEAUTIFUL post!! Made me cry! Would be thrilled to reproduce it on my blog, with some words of my own added to it. And I'd be honoured to also use the pics. BIG, big hugs hon x

Hi Josie, thank you so much I had to stop a few times writing it. Yes of course you can send me your number and I'll send you some more pics xx love you so much. Such a emotional day xx

SUCH an emotional day, honey. I know that it's also hugely upsetting as it's the first anniversary without him, and such a huge one too. That would be beautiful! My number is 04xxxxxxxx. Big, big hugs bello xx

Bella so sorry I had a wedding on and I forgot to update you - all the photos are online x

Thanks hon, will check them out! xx

Sadly, I never got to post the blog... and now I feel compelled to. This is for you, darling Anthony. One of the most beautiful people to ever walk this planet. I fell for your inner and outer beauty and sincerity immediately. As did every single person you've ever met and touched in some way.

His love for his family was like nothing I've ever seen before. The joy they felt simply to be in each others' presence was rare and beautiful. His closeness to his mother was... something else. I loved chatting with her at events. She is a beautiful Italian nonna you're drawn to immediately. She told me Anthony was like a daughter to her. Closer, even. Their bond was palpable, obvious, unbreakable. They adored each other. Anthony's bond with his sister and nieces was incredible. The adoration was deep and genuine and so beautiful to watch and be around.

His lifelong partner was Noel, and I adored chatting with him. It was evident their relationship was super close and loving and filled with fun. In an email to me a few months ago, Anthony called Noel his husband, and it was utterly gorgeous to read and hear. I have re-read all of Anthony's emails to me and my heart breaks. Anthony and Noel had been together 12 years.

To think I - and countless others - will never see this beautiful man again is heartbreaking. His smile, his laugh, his voice, his warmth... how will we ever cope with never seeing him again?

This is the caption he posted online with the photos:

"Today is a day that is filled with love in the Del Col home and one that is filled with emotions as we reflect and praise. 

50 years ago today my Mum & Dad got married and since that day the love and devotion towards each other has been as strong as it was in this photo of them walking out of the church as they became one.

My sister Teresa, brother Frank and I have brought these values and respect to our families that have been passed onto us and we thank you Mum and Dad every day for the sacrifices you made for us.

Cherish the special moments in life as at the end all you will have left to look back on is the memories that - like today - bring a smile to our families' faces.

Mum and Dad I love you more today than I did yesterday and I will love you more tomorrow than I did today.

Auguri x

Anthony

Anthony, fly with the angels, my love.

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Jennifer Hawkins Marries Jake Wall: PHOTOS in Woman's Day + Kyle & Jackie O radio interview

This just in...

Jennifer Hawkins has married ger long-time partner Jake Wall.

UPDATED: Woman's Day editor Fiona Connolly was on the Kyle & Jackie O radio show this morning revealing some details, as the magazine has paid a huge amount (reportedly $350,000 although Fiona disputed this on radio today), including:

- Jennifer wore a Toni Maticevski dress and she had a second dress for later in the evening (although Fiona told 2DayFM she loved her wedding dress so much so only wore her wedding gown and didn't get changed).

- The wedding was decorated with 20,000 roses (which is only 10,000 roses less than the Royal Wedding)

- Woman's Day will feature a 12 page spread, with 40+ pictures of the newly married couple

Here is the radio interview:

(Here is the first photo of the wedding in Bali, from Seven News):

'The Age' newspaper reports:

"Jennifer Hawkins, the former Newcastle Knights cheerleader who went on to become Miss Universe, a prized runway model, television host and head of her own multimillion-dollar empire, finally married her long-standing fiance, construction worker Jake Wall, in Bali late on Tuesday afternoon.

The wedding appeared to be an intimate affair, with around 70 guests descending on a white marquee adorned with huge bunches of fresh white flowers overlooking the Indian Ocean."

For more, go here.

Fiona Connolly said on the magazine's Facebook page:

"Woman’s Day can officially announce Jennifer Hawkins married her long-time sweetheart, Jake Wall, in a ceremony overnight! The nuptials, held at a luxury resort in Uluwatu, Bali, will feature in a special issue of Woman’s Day that will hit newsstands this Friday (on the East Coast of Australia, Monday for all other regions).

“The Woman’s Day team have been working for the past 24 hours to produce this very special issue,” says Woman’s Day Editor-in-Chief Fiona Connolly. “And talk about a fairytale!”

“These are some of the most amazing wedding pictures we have ever seen – with a gorgeous dress, a breathtaking cliff-top location, 3000 fairy lights and no less than 20,000 flowers, Jen and Jake had the ultimate magical wedding. I can say without any hesitation, this was definitely THE wedding of the year! The ceremony was so lavish, it’s a feast for the eyes and our readers will devour every single image!” adds Fiona.

They must be one of the cutest couples on the planet... so in love after all these years together, and they have stood by each other from the very beginning.

I was lucky to be one of the very first to interview Jennifer when she'd just won Miss Universe back in 2004. I'd be sent to Noosa on a job assignment for the magazine group I'd been working for and the interview time was set. It was a Friday. I recall because she'd done a shopping centre catwalk appearance on the Thursday and... that skirt falling down and showing her g-string and fabulous butt incident happened. Girl was mortified. And she told me so the next day when we spoke.

I recall she said her mother had advised to be okay with it all and realise that, guess what... her backside would probably never look better and she should be proud of it.

I agree with her mum. She should be proud! However, her backside has continued to look better... than ever!

I interviewed Jennifer last year for a Jetstar magazine cover story and Jennifer then invited me to a launch event for her swimming costume range, a party held at publicist Max Markson's home. She was as gorgeous as ever, inside and out. The couple were ridiculously, genuinely loved-up.

Huge congrats, Jennifer and Jake. Now... for the magazine wedding photos, out this Friday!

I know this photo below was for the fabulous marriage equality campaign run in Marie Claire, but I think it is so fitting today...

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The color blue and red candies too.

<<Aujourd'hui, maman est morte.>> 
That's the first line from the Stranger, one of my favorite books on our high school's curriculum and the basis of everything I would learn about Existentialism. I'm reading it now, in French and even though I'm seeing a lot of the vocabulary for the first time, I heard it used frequently, last week.

Sebastien's grandmother passed away and his parents came from the US to attend the funeral.

I had only seen her once, prior to her death--Sebastien took  me to Strasbourg to meet his Uncle and cousins and during that visit I only heard her speak a single time which was prompted by Sebastien's Uncle telling her that Seb's father was on the phone. He asked if she would like to speak with him. 

<< Oh, yes ! >> she had replied warmly. That was in 2009.

Sebastien and his parents visited her in Alsace last summer. I stayed in Paris because the trip interfered with my work schedule. As a result last week was the first time I had seen most of Seb's family in 4 years. I was hesitant to go in some ways, as if doing so would make a promise I was scared to keep. And anyway, funerals are personal, family affairs-- Sebastien's own sister couldn't even make it, and as I am merely the wife of a grandson...I didn't want to intrude.

But reluctant as I was, I knew it was my duty to attend. Sebastien has held my hand through both my brother and my father's death, in effect making that same promise I was scared to make, twice.

Am I being clear enough, dear reader?

It means something to meet your lover's parents. It means something else to accompany them to a wedding where you might interact with their family in a time of joy...it means quite another thing to stand beside them during tragedy.

My French has improved greatly since my first vacation to France. I was a little disappointed that nobody mentioned that at first, or slowed down when they spoke, or even asked me where I was from, but acceptance is it's own kind of compliment.

Interestingly enough, the whole affair was a joyful event punctuated by deep feelings and tears. Moving as those moments were I found they were overshadowed by droll stories and beautiful pictures. People had amazing tales of his grandmother. My favorite involved his great-Aunt and how she met her husband.

Sebastien's Grandmother was quite an accomplished seamstress. I've seen pictures of the Batman costume she made him as a child. 

Apparently she had  fashioned a blue velvet dress with a white collar for her younger sister, Sebastien's great-Aunt.

She told her little sister to put it on to go out to lunch. Her sister complied but leaned out the window to see what the weather would be like. It was raining and she was not looking forward to getting the new garment wet. She looked good in blue--this was never  mentioned but even now, in her mid 80's blue is her color.

While she's thinking about the weather a young man leans out his own window, across the street.

<< It's raining. >> He remarked.

<< Yes, it is. >> She agrees. << It's too bad because I was just about to go to a restaurant. >> She told this story more than once and she paused every time right here to say that she was too poor to eat at a restaurant, she was going to a cafe to buy a sandwich, but she didn't want him to know that.

<<You're going to eat some place? Well, I'm hungry too. Why don't we go together ? >> the young engineer leaning out his window proposed.

She agreed. Less than a year later, they were married. Fifty years ago now.

Any romantic anywhere would want to have a love story brought to you in part by the inconvenience of weather and a beautiful blue dress. C'est magique, ca !

I know Valentine's day is coming up and people are going to talk about what love is or isn't. How the holiday is manufactured and stupid and I get all of that, I really do.

But admit it--Valentines day was so awesome when we were in grade school. I don't know how they do things in France, but trading candy and paper puns was a textbook amazing afternoon for me. Red candies ranging from cherry to fire-flavored were front and center and somebody's mom inevitable brought in chocolate cupcakes. 

Pft, whatever. That holiday ruled.

This year Sebastien and I are dead broke. Both the trip to Rome and the visit to the US really put the breaks on our spending. 4 weeks of cumulative vacation does not come cheaply and the translation work he's had lately is enough to cover his half of the rent and little else. For my part, I was told I wouldn't be needed at the Local Bio until April and I had to take a day off from teaching for the funeral. So there won't be costly ingredients for our dinner nor the gifts I couldn't afford for him at Christmas. But there will be love, and I mean the blue dress kind.

Something he probably doesn't remember about when we got together, we had made it official on Valentine's day, yes. But two days later,  somebody's dad left three trays of cupcakes in my common room at college. I selected one with a plastic ring on the top and brought it over to Seb in his room, presenting it with a grin. I knew what I was doing, but I told myself I was only playing at promises and commitment. 

Later that night when the fire alarm got us out of our beds, I found him in the crowd and I handed him a Hershey's hug with the paper that said "I love you." I did so knowing that maybe it was too soon for such hints and insinuations. But why not romance someone if you have the chance? It's only candy and plastic promise rings anyway, right? 8 years later, I'm not sure if that's true. Why not ask us about it in 50 years.

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A Forever Kind of Love

Last week sitting at my desk I realized I had not seen my "couple friends" in a while.

This was unusual.

 

My Couple Friends are the sweetest old couple I've ever met in my life. I happen to meet them as two people just passing by at my work a few years ago. We got talking and I immediately felt drawn to them. My love for the elderly had a play in this, I'm sure.

After the first time I met My Couple Friends I immediately called my mom to tell her how much I adored these two people & didn't even know their names.

 

We actually got to know each other very well over the years. They have been with me through many large ups and downs & offered encouragement and advice. I have seen them thrilled and overjoyed about grandchildren and great grandchildren. I often treat them to lunch and their favorite cookies- white chocolate macadamia nut and snicker doodle.

When my Couple friends found out I was engaged they were both so excited. They immediately fell in love with my fiance whom they had never met, merely because I loved him. They have offered me wonderful marriage advice, and after stories of their life together 60+ years, they are still in love. They still hold hands & they still laugh with each other.

They have a forever kind of love.

My Couple Friends asked to get a wedding invite.

Months down the road, I carefully and lovingly wrote on their envelope...

Dale and Mava Russon.

 

A few weeks later my sweet sweet Couple Friends Dale and Mava came to visit me in my office. We talked and made a crazy connection.
When they saw my maiden name on their wedding invite, they realized they were my dad's Mission Presidents in California MANY years ago..

This was the first of many too-good-to-be-true connections I've had with the Russon's.

 

The Russon's were one of the first couples to show up at our wedding reception. Having them there meant more than words could express. They hugged and kissed me and let me know how proud they were of me. Dale and Mava are just like loving grandparents.

 

I've seen them twice since the wedding which has not been nearly enough.

Last week I had thought about them many, many times. Wondering where they've been. They have so many grandchildren and great grandchildren they must be busy with summer and family activities. Friday afternoon I felt like I should call them and check on them. I looked up their phone number, but decided not to dial.

 

{Last week sitting at my desk I realized I had not seen my "couple friends" in a while.

This was unusual.}

 

....

 

Yesterday I saw Dale's obituary in the newspaper and sobbed at my desk.

He died on Saturday, the day after I thought I should call... and didn't.

Yesterday I lost an unofficial grandpa. I loved him just like I love my own.

 

The advice and wise words I heard from sweet Dale mean more to me than ever.

I'm so so sad for his sweet wife Mava and for his family.

At 87 years old, he lived a beautiful fulfilling, happy life.

 

I'm so thankful for Eternal Families

and for a Forever Kind of Love.

 



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Priorities

This morning I had my priorities straight when I decided to sleep after my alarm went off.

Two extra minutes turned into 30 resulting in me already running late.

I flipped the bathroom light on and realized I still needed to straighten my mangled mess I could hardly call hair. Another 20 minutes gone. 

I put on minimal make up, quickly got dressed, kissed Spencer good bye & grabbed my purse to leave.

This is when the real problem starts..

I'm standing at the front door and Winston Bunny sees me. He quickly hops up to his cage door and puts his dirty little feet up, like "MOM LET ME OUT!"

Of COURSE I can't leave without lovin on that little guy. I opened his cage and gave him a few love pets. He's slowly inching forward to put his nose out of the cage door- obviously wanting to get out and hop around.

I FEEL SO BAD leaving such a cute thing in a cage all day.

I heard Spencer getting up so I let him out of his cage to hop around.

Spencer pointed out I was now REALLY late for work.

But.......

Spencer literally helped me to the door and shut it behind me. haha

HOW on earth can you leave something as cute as this behind?!

Winston has a hiding spot between the two couches where he loves to hang out.

He likes to sit with me as I flip through pages of my magazines

He likes to give kisses..

And I discovered he likes Keva Juice..

Winston likes us being on the floor with him..

This is when Winston is the most active. He will RUN around his cage, run around the couches, sprint down the hall and then KICK his feet and flip around. He'll jump straight up in the air and flip all over.. SO cute..

Winston is litter box trained, so when we are home he can hop around and be out of his cage- just like a little puppy! He has a few toys he likes- a pine cone and a little wooden carrot he likes to chew on. I cut up a towel to have in his cage so it was soft for his feet, and he LOVES the little towel scraps. He cuddles with them, chews on them, and will make them wrinkled and then smooth them out again. He's darling.

Last week Winston was CONSTANTLY licking me. I started to get worried thinking he had a vitamin deficiency or wasn't getting nutrients in his food.
When I googled why he was doing this, I was so happy.

The first page said "CONGRATULATIONS- you have a happy healthy bunny who has formed a bond with who he views as his mum!"

Turns out Winston just loves me.

He was totally worth being late to work today..

Winston, you were the best $25.00 purchase I've ever made..

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Process

Art as a physical process is something that I've made time to start exploring. I say 'physical' because it's painting, and gluing and spraying--it's tactile and hand held. I use the word 'process' because images take shape, are destroyed, recreated or reconceived and are manipulated yet again.

So as you might be able to tell, we found a TV on the street one night, and our friend carried up to the flat on a dare. I just rewatched the shaky video of the 5 floor climb. When we were all almost at the top, I asked him what his motivation was. "Love," he responded. I want to think on that as I explain the rest of this story.

I live in a large apartment with 9 other people. There are seven bedrooms, two couples and three sets of roommates. Some of us work in IT, finance or marketing. A couple  of us are teachers and one or two of us are fully funemployed.  We don't have a social space other than the kitchen, nor do we keep the same schedules. We have pretty unreasonable neighbors who live above said kitchen, and our landlords have been a little less than polite with how interested they are in most of us moving out. This has put a lot of strain on how often we want to congregate or how comfortable we all are with others hosting friends and guests, (which has been kind of a bummer now and then.)
One of my colocators is this American girl who I was really excited to have move in. She likes biking and music and sharing food so there hasn't been any drama.

Neither of us are really artists with a capital A, but, between the supplies we both had, we decided it would be fun to get together and paint on canvases, cut stensils and make collages. And there sat the TV on the piteous little couch someone is usually sleeping on, come the weekend.

We talked a lot about what we should do with it.  Everybody wants a TV fish tank now and then but in the end we decided to turn it into a planter for the english ivy we've got going on the balcony. Maybe I should have waited to write until the plant was ready to move in but this is post is at it's root about process.

Here is the plant hanging out in the hole we cut, before most of the painting happened

And here's where the process gets...involved.
We asked that everyone give something compostable over to the plant in its new home, you see we want to feed the plant with a little bit of everyone. Something given, not taken. Intentional, not happenstance-ical. It almost feels like a spell--like a prayer for our house to flourish and prosper. Plus everyone has been invited to paint something on.  In this way the TV has been a way for us to mend some of our fences, get to know each other better, and most importantly, remember why we like living together and spending time around our house. It's also kind of cool that we could take a device that pretends to be social, but can be just as alienating, and force it fully into the realm of community. Even with it's cord ripped off, this TV will be viewed. Plus it's art and it's functional. So in the end, what's my motivation? LOVE. 
And what an arduous climb that can sometimes be. 

What I'm learning from this project is not to be afraid of errors. If I do something I don't like, instead of giving up and and saying I've ruined it, I try to look at my gaffe as an opportunity to take the lines or colors in another direction. Once you relax and trust this, you realize there are no mistakes in art, but there is space for ingenuity.
At one point when I was feeling quite sure of myself I decided:
Art is destruction
and birth
and destruction

           and the viewer
and birth again

If you can strip away some of the pretention from that stanza, what you're left with is all that I have said above plus what the viewer brings to the piece and what it will mean to them. Art may not be eternal, but that's still not a very good argument against making it. I for one am not dissuaded--lacking in talent though I may be.

Well it's time for me to lay in the park for awhile.
Oh, and if you like the way I laid out the photos, I downloaded this free application. It's the best photo collager I've found. Happy Wednesday, may you make everything of this week that it deserves to be.

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All talk and velociraptors

When I was a kid I rebuilt my first bike with  my dad and my brother. We found a pretty choice BMX frame at the dump and got to work on it. We greased the bearings, oiled the chain, sanded the frame and trued the wheels. We called it the Halloween Bike because we spray painted it bright orange and found a black set of handel bars. Current events have brought these things back up for me.

My dad has always been self-employed, putting ads in local papers as a catch all handy man, prouder of me when I work my way up a level than if my education grants me access. His parents were of the Depression, and you could see that in his paint stained pants and pre-existing-condition-no-insurance staunch Republican stance---in his scrap metal side venture and vocal disdain for planned obsolescence.  The bike he taught me to ride on was an old Schwinn from the fifties. I think he's really into reselling lead soldiers online right now, but for awhile there, he had a solid E-bay business where he fixed bikes and sold them to Chicago college students.
Till the wheels fall off I can fix a flat, but other than that I've built only one more bike in my life, back at Uni--even so, the smell of grease, and WD40 will always make me remember that first bike with my Dad and my Zack.

My new coloc--A GIRL!!!!!!- showed me this bike coop where I'll be fixing up a cruiser three days a week. The deal is remarkable, 15 for the membership, parts, labor and education, and the bike is pay what you can. So I'm working on this velo and it's so cool because I've never worked on a cassette crank--I'm learning all kinds of technical language and a practical skills. Admittedly, my new ride is far from sex on wheels, but I'm going to put my time in on this one and pay the difference on another beautiful blue racer the shop was hoping to use to turn a profit. It's tubeless, so I'm planning to replace the tires and rims, ride it for awhile and give it back to them to sell when I leave Paris. Can't say how long this will all take, should be fun though!

A short time ago, in a galaxy near you, I was teaching English three times a week from behind my computer screen. It's kind of weird leading a course via the internet--mostly because I've never really had lectures modeled for me by other proctors. Back at University, the biggest class I was ever in had 30 people and even then the professor knew everyone's name and we all spoke freely.

-->The class I'm referring to was Existienalism, my second class with Sebastien. Oddly enough, the person whom I habitually sat next to would always draw pictures of Seba and write things he said out of context beneath the images. It's so weird that I'm writing this from a room that I share with him now, in a different country--no less, because when all of this was my here and now,  I didn't have a crush on him.......although upon honest reflection, it was slightly more important than it should have been for me to impress him with my intellect each time we spoke... frankly, I didn't give it too much thought, at the time. I guess that's how I managed to not screw it up.

On to my classes again, I think the most important aspect of language acquisition is to be sure you practice speaking, which is impossible when there are 60 some odd persons in attendance.
I had some fun with it, though.
It made me smile to mentally fill in the blanks of the following section with the singular or the plural of "suck."

If not now, when? If not me, who?

That's droll enough, but I actually had to stop a few times  to keep from cracking up while reading this next section out loud because filling in the blank  with "blank"was just as hilarious in my mind as using the ongoing action form, the past tense, or the infinitive of Fuck. Try it!

Blankety, blank, blank, blank--pilgrim. 

Damn, it feels good to be a teacher.
But you're all clever girls around here, you who know me so well rest assured that I'll not trans-mutate into a grammar genie. That's 'prolly why I'll stay all talk and velociraptors till the sky falls.

Off to test the fences, be well.

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