The French Elections, a civic education

As part of my naturalization process, it was mandated by the French government that I take part in a one-day civics class. They taught me about by-laws and symbols--the first king, what the colors of the flag mean and about as much back story on a 2000 year old culture as could be fit neatly between breakfast and dinner.

I'll be the first to admit that before dating Sebastien, I had the same sneering attitude towards the French that most Americans of my generation adopt.
That is to say, all things I "knew" about France could be summarized by this google bomb:

See also:
Wee Wee, Ms Clavell

Six years ago, I had precisely zero interest in learning French, living in France or even visiting France. But somehow sitting around a kitchen table where people are speaking in a different language, completely leaving you out of such fascinating discourses as, "pass the bread, if you please." I found I was quite suddenly interested in learning. Sometimes, because I'm so petty, I almost get annoyed when I think of his sister or his parents stopping their mundane dinner conversation to say, "Oh, I forgot--you don't speak French."
Here in  FRIGGIN Ohio, everyone speaks French.
Anyway, who can complain; between slowly learning French and reading nerdy fantasy novels with my husb-bee, my free rice niveau in English vocabulary has plateaued around level 42. This is upward mobility in it's most naked form--I'm gettin' wicked smarht. And it's time for us to face it, the French aren't pretentious, they're just better at Latin than we are.
Oh, ARE they?
The free lunch they gave me was excruciatingly bland, but in one day, I was told so much--I learned that there are 26 regions and 96 counties on mainland France. I learned that slavery was abolished in 1848 but that woman didn't get the right to vote until 1944. I learned that it's not actually illegal for me to play my music loudly after ten pm, but it goes against the concept of fraternity . I learned that Catholicism wasn't made the state religion in France until 1589 and there are things as old as the pyramids in Normandy.  I learned that there have been 5 republics in France and that the 4th ended with the German occupation's beginning.

I learned that Presidential elections happen every five years, that you don't need to be a natural-born citizen to run for office and that there is no term limit for the presidency. And that was about it. I got a piece of paper, my third French diploma--gotta catch them all, as they say--and headed home to randomly spout facts about achievements and emperors.
Guise, guies--This one time, in France...
The 2012 election was highly anticipated, from talk around the dinner table these last few months, I gathered that major players in this election were The Front National, UMP and the Parti Socialist.

There was also a collection of left-wing parties who called themselves le Front Gauche and a Centrist party member who ending up coming out in favor of the Socialist candidate for the second round of elections, once his party had been eliminated.
Anyway, we were all very curious to see if the UMP candidate, Nicolas Sarkozy would stay in power. If he lost, he would be the first president since the 70's not to serve two consecutive terms and if the socialist candidate François Hollande, won he would be the first of his party elected in 17 years. (Fun fact: His ex-wife ran and lost as the socialist candidate in 2007.) That's actually not so fun actually, if you actually think about it...like, really actually--yeah.
The first round of elections knocked out all but those two, but I was still pretty ashamed to be living in France when I saw how well the openly xenophobic candidate, Marine Le Pen, did. This ended up being useful to the over-all election spread however, because it meant that Sarko had to pander to the far right, trying to gather those votes--pushing the centrist  towards the left and to the only remaining candidate: Hollande, the socialist.

It was around 8 pm on Sunday night, Sebastien and I had just settled down into a nice plate of, uh...Mexicanos.
Are they made with real girl scouts?
We would have openly scoffed at such a dish back in the States but bar food around here is mostly vodka, absinthe and jagermeister. That is to say, one doesn't eat if it's not dinner time....unless it's suddenly breakfast.

So we were chomping down when we heard all sorts of ruckus out the window and by just moving towards the balcony, we completely learned the results of the election in under two mins. Worst timing ever, we weren't even tipsy.
WHERES MEH DAMN FOREPLAY, FRANCE?
I remember getting white girl wasted for the second Bush election when it was all but confirmed we were going to lose. My boyfriend at the time refused to let me sleep in the bathroom by the toilet. Gawd, who even invited you over? Anyway, I recovery positioned in my wee college bed and woke up sometime durring my Legitimation and Capitalism class to the b-friend saying, "Stay in bed Erin, the republicans have taken not only the presidency but also the House and the Senate." I moaned a weak Noooo, and moved my limbs experimentally. Hungover owls times a billion. You don't even know. I rarely missed class but I knew my professor wouldn't find my actions untoward. It was a very easy equation. Much simpler, I find then dying batteries and an absent camera.
That's right, these are all the photos I got, since my borrowed camera crapped its pants as I ran towards the celebration. I would have loved to document the event further, but I feel privileged to have witnessed it at all, it was like finding the gift in the garbage--
One man's treasure and all of that..
All the flags and the happy people--the smoke bombs and the flairs. The slogans and the chants. There was a good vibe and the cops were well in hand.
Here is all the video my camera was gracious enough to take between battery outages and my near crying silent frustration fits. I added English subtitles to the best of my capacities.

So there you have it, a Socialist president in France. The Euro dipped for a minute after the election was decided, but honestly, I think we're all kidding ourselves if we think things are going to drastically change in Europe. As a post-campaign-promises-American, who was totally ready to join Dumbledore's Obama's army, I don't exactly believe that Hollande will tax the rich 75% after their first million, but I do think that focusing on growth rather than cuts is a wise move and one worth watching play out for the next five years.

We take for granted peaceful elections and transitions of power in the occidental world but when we were packed into le Place de la Bastille, the symbolic location of France's first revolution and no one was tear gassing me or spitting rounds on full auto, I looked around at the Frenchmen and well wishers and considered how much we do together is based on faith and in faith I do believe. Even if I am a little bit afraid of patriotism...and tomatos.


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