Holidays Gone Wrong! (Blog Swap)

Hello my lovelies by inheritance, I am TOAR from Thoughts of a Randomista, but normal people just call me Lynn. Erin and I were supposed to join in on 20 something blogger's blog swap on Monday the 20th but as you can see, we are fucking rebels. I like to blog about everything from internet porn and hand jobs to dumb ass white people who don't know what the word "Killer" means. Yes, I am a raunchy racist but I can't help it. My mom is a white baptist and my dad is a black Muslim, I am bound to have an identity crisis. Right? Anyway, at Thoughts of a Randomista I like to create an open environment (Random Writing Chaos!) to talk about all these cliches and make fun of people. It's all in good fun so get your draw out of your ass. Lastly, TOAR is having a giveaway for it's 1 year anni-berfday! So follow TOAR to get more info! Now on to more important matters like crazy families drunk off their asses during the holidays. I give you: "Holidays Gone Wrong"
Every year during thanksgiving and Christmas, my family likes to have this huge get together (like most I suppose) to eat food and talk shit. Now, my family isn't the kind that just likes to fight amongst themselves, it's a different kind of holiday experience. My family is a bunch of hippies therefore, you never know what to expect! We don't plan anything because it is simple... Eat, Drink, and be Hippies!
My point is, there is so much to do to have the perfect holiday but in essence you are just fucking it up.
Why must there be the perfect pie? Let me tell you right now, no one gives a fuck! We are going to eat it and then go to sleep and shit it out later.
Why do you have to deep fry a turkey? You are asking for death to come and stab you in the face with his black-sword-stick-thing-amagig.
Why do we have to have 527282 different kinds of rum in our eggnog? Tequila and whip cream will do just fine.
Why must we gather in a huge circle around the dinner table and everyone has to say a part of the prayer? People?! We are hungry folks that are trying to look at the babies open their over priced presents. I mean of course we have to bless the food, but we do not need 50 people saying their own version of "dear lord, thank you for this food we are about to receive..." Just be done with it! "good food, good drinks, thank god, let's eat!" <-- SIMPLE lol. One person is just fine. Why can't we just get along? I know there are people out there who are as blessed as I am to have a fuck-awesome family like mine. They fuss and fight and bicker and it gives me a damn head ache. Let's not even talk about what happens in the kitchen! Women are so ruthless. I just want people to have an interesting and eventful Holiday. Do you have any stories to share? any of your Holidays Gone Wrong? ----------------------- View Erin's view on "Holiday's Gone Wrong" on TOAR. To Contact TOAR, email her at: thoughtsofarandomista@gmail.com

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